How to Create a Deliberate Remembrance Garden
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Grief is a journey, and one of the most healing ways to honor loved ones we’ve lost is by creating a remembrance garden. A deliberate remembrance garden is more than just a space filled with flowers and plants—it’s a place of memory, reflection, and gratitude. Every plant, object, and design choice can hold meaning, becoming a living tribute that grows and blooms year after year.
In this post, I want to share what it means to create a deliberate remembrance garden and give you a glimpse into how I’ve created spaces to honor two very special people in my life.
What Is a Deliberate Remembrance Garden?
A deliberate remembrance garden is intentionally designed to reflect the life, personality, and passions of someone you love. Unlike a traditional flower bed, it isn’t just about what looks beautiful—it’s about symbols and stories. Each flower, plant, or decoration becomes a reminder of shared moments, favorite colors, hobbies, or special sayings.
It can be as small as a single planter or as large as a full garden space. What matters most is that it feels personal and meaningful to you.
Honoring My Grandma
My grandma was one of those rare people who could share her warmth the minute you met her. You never had to knock at her door—she already had it open, arms wide for a hug.
One of her greatest passions was gardening. Her big, beautiful garden was always weed-free, and every summer it produced more than enough to share with neighbors, friends, and family. Tomatoes, peppers, and onions were her specialty—perfect for the best canned salsa you’ve ever tasted.
In her honor, I created a garden space filled with those same plants. As they grow, I look forward to making her salsa recipe with my own harvest. Every time I step into that space, I feel her near, and I’m reminded of her love, generosity, and the life she brought into our world.
Honoring My Sister-in-Law
When we lost my sister-in-law, we wanted to create a space that reflected her spirit—joyful, creative, and deeply connected to those she loved.
As we planted, we paused often—grateful for each memory. Here’s what we chose:
Climbing Honeysuckle – her favorite flower: beautiful, delicate, and a little wild, just like her.
Russian Sage – purple, her favorite color.
Butterfly charms – she believed butterflies were messages from her grandma, “GG.”
Wind chime – a gentle reminder of her laughter and amazing sense of humor.
Daisies – for her gift of writing poetry.
Now, whenever we sit in that corner of the garden, we are filled with gratitude for the time we had with her and for the love she brought into our lives.
Tips for Creating Your Own Deliberate Remembrance Garden
If you’d like to create a remembrance garden of your own, here are a few simple steps to get started:
Reflect on their personality – Were they vibrant, peaceful, bold, or gentle? Let that guide your plant choices.
Choose meaningful plants – Think about their favorite flowers, colors, or even foods they loved to grow or eat.
Incorporate symbols – Wind chimes, charms, stones, or plaques can carry memories.
Design a quiet space – Whether it’s a bench, stepping stones, or a small fountain, make it a place where you can pause and reflect.
Make it living and ongoing – Add to it over the years as new memories or inspirations come.
A Garden That Heals
Creating a deliberate remembrance garden doesn’t take away the pain of loss, but it transforms grief into gratitude. Every bloom, every breeze, and every visit to the garden becomes a reminder that love continues to grow.
My grandma and sister in law live on in these spaces, and I’m so thankful for the way these gardens keep their memories alive.
Need Help Getting Started?
If you’d like more guidance in designing a remembrance garden of your own, I’ve created a Deliberate Remembrance Garden Workbook, available right here in my shop.
This workbook walks you through the process step by step—helping you reflect on your loved one’s life, choose meaningful plants and symbols, and design a healing space that feels personal to you.